Bereavement by Suicide

Bereavement by suicide causes a deeply complex and devastating form of grief that requires our attention, empathy, and understanding.

When a loved one dies by suicide it shatters lives and leaves behind an indescribable pain. In this post, we aim to shed light on the overwhelming emotions experienced by family and friends of someone who completes suicide, breaking the silence that often surrounds this topic. By normalising these feelings, we hope to foster compassion and create a supportive environment for those who have been impacted by suicide.

Traumatic and Complicated Grief

The grief following a suicide is often characterised by its traumatic and complicated nature. The sudden loss leaves survivors grappling with a mix of intense emotions, ranging from shock and disbelief to profound sadness and despair. The traumatic element stems from the suddenness and unexpected nature of the death, leaving survivors with vivid and distressing memories that may haunt them.

Complicated grief is common among those bereaved by suicide. It manifests as a prolonged and complex mourning process, wherein individuals may find it challenging to accept the reality of the loss and struggle to move forward. Feelings of intense longing, an inability to experience joy, and persistent thoughts about the deceased become common, often impeding the natural grieving process.

Unanswered Questions and Guilt

One of the most agonising aspects of death by suicide is the quest for answers. Loved ones are left grappling with an array of unanswered questions, chief among them being "Why did they take their life?" It's important to recognise that understanding the reasons behind suicide is often a complex task. Mental health struggles, emotional pain, and various personal circumstances can contribute to someone's decision to end their life. It's crucial to remember that it is not always possible to pinpoint a single cause or attribute blame to any one person.

In addition to grappling with unanswered questions, survivors may experience intense guilt and self-blame. They might question their ability to recognise the warning signs, blame themselves for not intervening, or harbour feelings of responsibility for the loss. It is essential to remember that mental health challenges can be multifaceted, and even with the best intentions, it may not always be possible to prevent suicide. The guilt experienced by survivors is often misplaced, and it is important that they receive reassurance and understanding.

Anger, Blame, and the Healing Journey

Anger is a natural part of the grief process following bereavement by suicide. Survivors may experience anger towards the deceased for leaving them behind, towards themselves for not doing more, or towards others they perceive as having contributed to the circumstances leading to the suicide. These emotions, while challenging to navigate, are valid and should be acknowledged and expressed in a healthy manner.

Sadness and Despair

Sadness and despair are ever-present companions for those bereaved by suicide. The pain of loss can feel overwhelming, as survivors grapple with the reality that their loved one wanted to leave this life. It's important to provide avenues for individuals to express their emotions openly and without judgment. We encourage accessing therapy or support groups to help with processing such deep and complex emotions.

The Importance of Support and Compassion

Navigating the complex grief of suicide requires a supportive network of understanding individuals. Survivors need spaces where they can share their pain, fears, and frustrations without judgment or stigmatization. Friends, family, and communities play a vital role in offering compassion, empathy, and genuine support.

Supportive environments that encourage open conversations and provide non-judgmental spaces can play a crucial role in this healing journey. Our bereavement friendship groups can make a significant difference in the healing process. The groups offer a listening ear in safe, supportive environments in which to share feelings with others who understand grief first-hand.

As a society, we must work to dismantle the stigma surrounding suicide and mental health, allowing individuals to speak openly about their experiences. Educating ourselves on suicide prevention, awareness, and the challenges faced by those struggling with mental health can help create a more compassionate and understanding environment.

Conclusion:

The grief experienced by family and friends bereaved by suicide is profound and complex, encompassing a range of emotions from traumatic memories and overwhelming despair to guilt, anger, and sadness. By normalising these feelings and fostering understanding, we can create an environment of compassion and support for those who have been impacted by suicide. It is essential to provide spaces where survivors can express their emotions openly and receive non-judgmental support as they navigate their healing journey. Together, we can work towards breaking the silence, reducing stigma, and fostering a more compassionate society that embraces and supports those affected by suicide loss.